My Girl

No one should have to learn to ride a bike at ten, especially not at eleven. Juliana has never been interested in learning to ride. We explained to her over and over that some day she would care and it would be so much easier to learn to ride when she was little.

Then last summer she decided to try. Birch took her out several times and by the fourth or so time she somewhat had learned to balance. She "checked off the box" of bike riding and her bike has been relaxing in the back garage ever since.

This summer Birch has been teaching Holt and tonight she decided she wanted to ride also, assuming she'd pick up right where she left off. It was really like learning to ride all over again.

Just getting started was a huge uphill battle. Several times Birch and I both asked her if she wanted him to give her a push to get her started. She didn't. Quite frankly, she didn't say much at all to us the entire duration of time we were there. Once she got going, she had to completely relearn how to balance. Over and over again, she hopped sideways off her bike before falling to the ground. I could see her getting more and more frustrated.

About the thirteenth time she had barely avoided disaster, she shrugged her bike to the ground and began the typical Juliana Meltdown. It goes something like this:
1) Make That Face
2) Begin to Cry
3) Speak Aloud all the Reasons You are Upset

At this point, I felt it was all over. I started walking toward her to bring her some of that Mama Wisdom and she saw me coming and walked the other way. I respect that. When you need a moment, you need a moment and I completely wanted her to have it.

I turn around and give her some space and focus my attention on Holt's progress. The next thing I know, I see her coming. I think I audibly heard the soundtrack from Chariots of Fire. The look on her face I will remember forever. It said, "I am doing this. It didn't beat me. I didn't give up. Don't count me out." I will never forget that moment. I won't forget the sobs I held back. I won't forget the overwhelming urge to pull her off that bike and hold her. Dear God, thank you for this girl. You made her with all her glorious quirks and I love her so much I think I'll burst!"

Later this evening, she told me the whole time she was making that triumphant ride across the parking lot, she was in-her-head singing the lyrics to the song from VBS "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

It's a good thing I didn't know that at the time. There's only so much I can handle before becoming a public mess. And trust me, no one wants that. Least of all Juliana.